80th Place

So that's where we finished up--80th in the Intermediate/Scaled teams of 3 category for women.  Out of 266 that doesn't seem too shabby.  I recognize a few other local teams that finished a little ways ahead of us--Rachel Rosenthal, Amber Zlotnik, etc. 

The workouts went ok, after I made my peace with being inferior at EVERYTHING in comparison to Jess.  She's basically superhuman, with like a 7th gear to kick into or something.  I only have 3: slow, medium, and will-die-soon (reserve this gear for when there's only 30 seconds left in the workout). I beat Lisa at 3 of the 6, a 4th is hard to compare (each athletes did different weights of deadlift-clean-overhead combos), and the 5th involved double-unders which tragically I struggled with, in spite of having been doing SO WELL LATELY with Nick.  I did the workout twice, inconceivably (it was an 18 minute AMRAP!!!!), and did better round two by a little bit, but still pretty poorly.  Anyway, it's over, I gave a good effort, and now I can get back to normal things.  Or not?

Hurt my shoulder at work doing the most retarded benign action of pushing against a heavy door.  It's right at the humeral head, and rather intensely painful with a variety of pushing/lifting movements whenever my arm isn't T-Rexed to my body to spare it.  How interesting that my perspective changes SOOOOOOO quickly.  The hours and days before I was lamenting the difficulty of working out HARD.  Then I hurt myself and ALL I WANT IS TO BE ABLE TO WORK OUT HARD!  God, PLEASE let this be brief, and minor.  I saw Dave Yancey at Accelerate yesterday and he monkeyed around with it and my feet which have been bugging me after double-unders.  HOLY MOLY on the feet, OW!  Give the girl a bullet to bite on.  The shoulder he didn't seem to find anything significant...so I guess I baby it for a while, use the quack root-beer oil, ice, ibuprofen, and hope it stops being mad.

The feet haven't been getting WORSE really, so I'm relieved about that, but also I went to Endurunce today to get properly fitted and the right pair of shoes.  Asics.  Ugly.  Better be worth it. 

I note that eating was a major lament of my last post, and that, encouragingly, has been much better.  Nothing much else to report...the Tri is coming up next, so I'll try to be diligent about the biking, running, swimming the next two weeks.  I've decided not to get clip-ins and a wet-suit...though I'll probably have a lot of explaining to do to Joel.  I don't have the money right now, and all I want to do is to DO one.  Not make an amazing time or anything.  So we'll have to swim in a sport's bra and shortie-shorts, ride with tennis shoes, and make it work.  Hopefully people will think I'm just adorable and not a pathetic idiot. 

Ctrl+Alt+Delete

That's what I feel like I should do to this entire past week.  It's been a pretty demoralizing disaster, which makes me FEEL like all the work done before equates to NOTHING.  But I don't think that can actually be true.  I HOPE that can't actually be true.  It was the 4th of July Weekend, we went quickly from OVERKILL on workouts the week before to UNDERKILL, giving up on my scheduled plan, attempts at healthy eating, etc.  The last workout with Nick was busy with people, and we didn't even get to snatches/overhead squats--the thing which should be my priority.  I did a couple cross-fit workouts at integration which went fine, but I'm totally unexceptional at (sorry for ending that sentence and this one with "at").  My GG partner was there and it's still awkward, and she got a PR on split jerk--170lbs I think.  I did 155 poorly.  Awesome.  That made me crabby all day, as I stuffed my face.  Monday I did the workout, and was thinking it was going pretty well with a number of 135lb cleans--a weight that's challenging for me.  Tyler came over and tried to fix my clean, which apparently is not improving at all.  I have a MAJOR BLOCK WITH ALL LIFTS that I CAN'T GET OVER apparently.  I DON'T extend my hips, and it's like I CAN'T.  I just smack the bar into the crease when I try, and it doesn't help me move it up.  I felt embarrassed because my form sucks so bad and I hate that.  Not that he wasn't nice--he kept saying, "You're SO STRONG," which is code for "how in the world can you even get THAT weight up with such sucky technique?" 

Monday night I skipped the swim I was gonna do. Tuesday, July 4th, I ate crap all day long and didn't work out.  That brings us to the present.  Today I DID swim, thank goodness.  It's exactly one month to the Triathlon.  Today also happens to be the day the team workouts are released (7pm), so I get to look forward to finding out JUST how much of a deficit I'm going to cause my Crossfit team.  Nick is waiting to plan my month based on these qualifiers.  Siiiiiiigggggggh.  I just feel so out-of-control and demoralized.  The optimism of the first week has disappeared with the conclusion of the month, and the feeling of minimal improvement. 

At the least I have been biking a lot for the tri, and swimming a few times also.  So my lifts still suck?  I'll just horse it up to the best of my ability like always, and then people will always hold hope for my potential ("Wow!  Think how good she would be if she fixed her technique!").  Good.  Even if that potential is never realized.

Be back sometime after the qualifier workout *eeeek.*  That'll be great when THAT'S in the past.  :D